There are those who will contend that — contrary to the claims being made by the author in the title of this post — that what Dodgers pitcher Hyun-Jin Ryu is captured doing here, in this artisanally crafted animated GIF file, doesn’t constitute a bat flip proper.

What those people don’t understand is, is that the author is paid to make breezy comments about trivial baseball occurrences. And also that, relative to an infinite universe, that all is trivial, actually. And also that we’re, all of us, cadavers merely awaiting our future caskets.

Credit to internet user/abuser urbuddy haysoos for bringing the author’s attention to this Moment in History.

Previously: Eric Jagielo / Trey Michalczewski.

Both the present author and Brewers reliever John Axford are professionals in their respective fields. As a result, any and all conversations conducted between them are, by definition, professional conversations.

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On the one hand, Josh Hamilton’s enthusiasm for swinging — documented in some depth by FanGraphs managing editor Dave Cameron earlier this season — has very likely hurt his ability to produce at a high level offensively. On the other, it allows one to make amusing constellations from the pitches at which Hamilton has swung.

Here, now, we see another entry in what may or may not become an ongoing series — in this case, from Hamilton’s May 22nd game against the Mariners (box). The constellation here bears more than a passing resemblance to a delicious prime rib, such as one might order at a Princeton eating club — or, at least, such as a cartoon character might order in a cartoon version of a Princeton eating club.

Credit to Texas Leaguers for the strikezone plot.

Previously: Trey Michalczewski.

It’s no use concealing the fact, reader, that your life is a series of failures, each more disappointing than the last.

Rather than trying in vain to improve your own station in life, however — which course of action is likely to end only in even greater embarrassment — consider regarding the brief victories of other, more able-bodied and -minded humans. Like this changeup by Ross Wolf, for example, from earlier today — with which pitch Wolf struck out contact-oriented Oakland catcher John Jaso.

Regard the footage until its enchantment wears off. Then proceed to another area of the internet and repeat.

The Scout feature of MLB.com’s Gameday service is generally regarded as innocuous, if sometimes less than helpful, by the Baseballing Public.

For reasons that aren’t entirely clear, however, a recent strikeout by A.J. Burnett of opposing pitcher Felix Hernandez prompted the Scout in question to inspect the poorly constructed foundation on which his own assumptions of the world are perilously built.

As the reader will note, the initial comment bears considerable resemblance to the Scout’s usual sort of analysis:

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