Image thanks to Andy Gray at SI Vault.
Damn, Earl Weaver, you knew how to walk the line — though often, you crossed it. Thrown out at least 91 times, even today you might be thrown to the wolves for your lack of small balls. Big balls only, you always said; sport coats and ties. But Schlitzes, Marlboros, too, in their time. You knew how to walk that line.
“…and so I knew it was time to hang it up once I realized my O-Swing % with the A’s in ’07 was way higher than my career norms.”
“…the numbers might say I was -62.9 fielding runs for my career, but my off-the-cuff calculations had me at something closer to -40. Then again, I was a late convert from Total Zone to UZR.”
“…sure, you could say my numbers were a little low in high leverage situations. But if you look at how I did with men in scoring position, you’ll see there’s no statistically significant difference with how I did when no one was on base.”
“…did I use steroids? Let’s just say I did a comprehensive cost-benefit calculation and made the economically rational decision, taking into account the risk of getting caught and the reputational effects factored out over the rest of my expected years of remaining life.”
Jumbo McGinnis — noun \d͡ʒəm-boʊ mɪk-gɪn-ɪs\
Jumbo McGinnis — verb \d͡ʒəm-boʊ mɪk-gɪn-ɪs\ [Jumbo McGinnis’ing, Jumbo McGinnis’d, Jumbo McGinnis’s]
example: “Ted’s proposal could not have gone any worse even if he had stamped onto the boardroom table, marched to Stevenson’s tablet, and Jumbo McGinnis’d a fat, mushy Jumbo McGinnis right on that shimmering touchscreen.”
Today, while strolling to my morning massage, I happened upon this rolling through the dawn-Frenched streets of America, U.S.A. …
I flagged down a taxi and followed it to the shopping center that features TG&Y and Otasco. Like you, I assumed Enos Cabell had merely slathered his poon schooner in Greg Minton Fatheads. Upon closer inspection, however, I discovered that each commissioned Greg Minton image was lovingly crafted by Olan Mills himself.
I studied the Greg Minton customized van for the duration of eight cigarettes — in the back, I could make out what appeared to be a velveteen sofa the color of an eggplant beaten with a liver — and then I noticed Enos Cabell sprinting toward me out of the TG&Y.
What happened next, I dare not say.
1. The author purchased this weekend MiLB.TV as part of his 2013 subscription to MLB.TV. The service, which costs ca. $40 by itself, costs half that (ca. $20) when bundled with an MLB.TV subscription.
2. Here is a graphic — clickable for purposes of embiggening — of all the clubs whose home games are made available with MiLB.TV.
There’s a divide between bloggers and we who actually cover sports between paying attention to numbers versus how a player actually looks on the field. Last year, Giants’ pitcher Tim Lincecum did not have his usual stellar numbers. He walked too many people. He gave up too many home runs. He won five games less than he lost. His appearance matched his numbers. He looked dejected and lost. He looked like he forgot how to win. One thing that didn’t change was Lincecum’s long locks. Lincecum has been dubbed The Freak, due to his unusual pitching delivery, but that title could have easily applied to his, let’s say lady-like hair.
Well, it appears as if the mane is gone.
I, for one, am glad. Whenever I saw Lincecum, I couldn’t help be reminded of the diamond heroes of my childhood; Mantle, Yaz, Drysdale. These men were poster boys for the way a ballplayer should look. They were the faces you imagined when you thought of the greatest players of the gentleman’s game. These were prototypical champions. They belonged on baseball cards and cigarette ads and cereal boxes.
Lincecum, with his hair falling out of the back of his hat, reaching his shoulders at times, looked more like a poster from a skateboarding magazine. Some players like to have their abilities do all the talking for them. Lincecum, blessed with great abilities at one time, let his slacker looks tell the fans all they needed to know. Here stands a pitcher who is more interested in looking good than playing well. Cal Ripken never had long hair. Neither did Jeter or Bench.
But now, much to the chagrin of the female fans (and probably some men, too – it IS San Francisco, after all) Lincecum has shorn his selfish moptop. Much like his probable favorite band, Metallica, he is going for a more clean demeanor. He looks more like Koufax than Gene Simmons. More Seaver than Tom Petty.
Perhaps this will help him get back to his true form. The hours spent fixing his do can now be spent throwing bullpen sessions or studying hitters. With athletes now-a-days more interested in their next tattoo or how much their jeans cost, it’s good to see a player go back to his roots (no pun intended).
We’ll know in a couple of weeks if Lincecum the Pitcher is back to his old self. But one thing is for sure. The new-look Lincecum is a sight for sore eyes. He may still be a boy of summer, but he looks like a man with a purpose.
(photo via Alex Pavlovic)
so much depends
upon
a red schoen
dienst
brushed with spring
shadows
against a green
wall
In yesterday’s latest-night edition of Spotted, we found — for reasons that weren’t entirely clear at the time — found Zack Segovia of Puerto Rican club Caguas intentionally walking former major-leaguer Karim Garcia, currently of Mexican club Yaquis de Obregón.
In tonight’s edition, we find a another grainy daguerreotype — in this case, not of Garcia being walked intentionally, but hitting a tie-breaking jonron in the top of the 14th inning of tonight’s/this morning’s Caribbean Series title game in Hermosillo.
“I, in fact, am Karim Garcia,” the Obregon DH appears to be suggesting, arms raised and rounding first base.
If Robert Pollard of famous and elderly indie-rock group Guided by Voices was in the business of making animated GIFs, he’d make an animated GIF not entirely unlike this one — of Ricardo Nanita tying the Caribbean Series title game, in the ninth inning, off Luis Ayala, from a probably illegal and rather low-quality video feed.
Piracy in action!
The author, who knows zero percent of Spanish, is currently watching an illegal video stream of the Caribbean Series — the other occupants of which video stream are conversing in a chat area exclusively by means of the Spanish language.
In this post, I will use Google Translate to understand poorly what they are saying!
User: koricoman
Comment: “Vamos Mexicooo!!! saludos desde peñasco, son. y nos vemos en phoenix en el clásico 2013.”
Translation: “Let Mexicooo! greetings from rock, are. and see you in Phoenix in 2013 classic.”
Note: “Let Mexicooo, indeed!” one is compelled to say for reasons that aren’t entirely clear.
