Yu Headlines Yu Are Likely to See if Yu Plays in MLB

I have it. You have it. Yu has it. We all have it. “It” is Yu Fever. As you have likely heard already, yesterday it was revealed that the Texas Rangers won the right to negotiate with the Japanese-Persian phenom, Yu Darvish. If the Rangers are indeed successful in securing Darvish’s services, our collective Yu Fever will rise from a toasty but manageable 100.5 degrees all the way to an immediate-ice-bath-or-die 106 degrees.

Perhaps more importantly, punny headline writers at newspapers, websites, and other journalistic outfits will be beside themselves with excitement. For, the pitcher’s first name, “Yu,” is homophonous with the second person personal pronoun, “you,” which just creates all kinds of wonderful opportunities for them to work their lame, punny headline writing craft.

Below, please find a checklist of Yu headlines you are likely to see should Yu sign with the Texas Rangers.

Keep this post bookmarked for the 2012 season (and beyond) and be on the lookout for any of the these headlines. If you spot one, drop us a line. This post will be updated as the headlines appear.

__ “Yu Have Got to be Kidding Me”

__ “Are Yu Serious?”

__ “Can Yu Believe It?”

__ “Yu Better Believe It”

__ “Yu Know It”

__ “Ohhhhh Baby Yu, Yu Got What I Need”

__ “I Could Get Yused To This” (Not a play on the “Yu” “You” homophony, I know)

__ “Yu Never Know”

__ “Yu Sonofagun”

__ “What Yu See is What Yu Get”

__ “I <3 Yu”

__ “Yu Complete Me” (Especially after a complete game.)

__ “Don’t Yu Dare”

__ “Yu Don’t Say”

__ “Yu Stink”

__ “I Wouldn’t Do That if I Were Yu”

__ “I Hate Yu”

__ “Loving Yu (Is Easy Because You’re Beautiful)”

__ “I’ll Do Me, Yu Do Yu”

__ “F*** Yu”

__ “Yu Done Goofed”

__ “That’s For Me to Know and Yu to Find Out”

__ “Yu Shook, ‘Cause Ain’t No Such Thing as Halfway Crooks”

__ “See Yu In Hell”

__ “Yu Died on a Saturday Morning”