What Were the Twins Doing in 1991?

You might ask yourself, dear reader, you might ask yourself, “what were the Twins doing in 1991?” Especially, you might be asking yourself this because that is, in fact, the title of this article. After you’re done asking that, “Probably playing baseball,” is one answer that you could give, if you weren’t particularly clever. “Winning the World Series,” is another for the more literal-minded of you. Yes, these are both things that the Twins were doing in 1991. But among other things they were also doing, such as eating, sleeping, grooming their mustaches and mullets, watching Cheers, enjoying the musics of Color Me Badd and C+C Music Factory, and wondering if a viable third party candidate might emerge in next year’s presidential election, were the following:

Being hot.

Coming on strong.

Having Kelly at the wheel.

Not going wrong.

Lookin’ straight ahead on the right track.

Not turning back.

Having Puck, Chuck, Jack, Mack, Chili, Willie, Bush, Tap, Harper, Gladden, Al, and Gags. Hrbek, Willis, Gene, and Pags. Aguilera, Erickson, Teddy, and Bedrosian. Guthrie, West, and the rest.

Having the best.

Commencing to get off and running.

Observe:

Other things they were doing included filming music videos, which I am also embedding below so you can see important things like: “funny” Jack Morris the hacky-sack enthusiast, competent dancing by Willie Banks, Kent Hrbek’s emphatic and enthusiastic pointing skills, baby-faced Chuck Knoblauch’s juggling, the daily ritual of jokingly pelting Al Newman with baseballs, the daily ritual of angrily pelting Scott Erickson with baseballs, and, of course, Chili Davis almost tearing an ACL. All of which was happening under the apparently watchful, but lenient eye of Tony Oliva, who, frankly, ought to be ashamed of himself for not putting a stop to this tomfoolery.

But it was a far more innocent time in 1991, and who could anticipate the blow to everyone’s dignity that these videos would be once they were archived on the then-in-its-infancy Internet? Let us now commence to get off and running at destroying said dignity:

Still, what a great club they were, and I challenge you to find me a team with as large a music video/world championships ratio. Happy Friday, everybody.