Punishing Baseball’s Rogues with Insulting Coffee Mugs: Cap Anson

Cap Anson is factually a Hall of Famer, but in a day when everyone was a racist, Anson still managed to distinguish himself on this front. He did so by refusing to take the field against any but the most porcelain-skinned of competitors. He was also, according to contemporary reportage, a huge asshole in other regards.

So today I, in Lance Ito fashion, sit in solemn judgment of Mr. Anson. Mr. Anson, you are a baseball rogue and a stain upon this game’s great history. What follows is your punishment …

Mr. Anson, not only were you a rank bigot who stood athwart progress and equality, but you were also, according to the testimony of the above coffee mug, the World’s Worst Grandpa.

Get the hell out of my courtroom, Cap Anson.