Moments before Justin Verlander completed his no-hitter on Saturday, Rogers Sportsnet presented home viewers with this image — i.e. what sabermetric paterfamilias Bill James would currently look like if, instead of running headlong into a life of cliche-destroying and brow-furrowing, he just wore a whole bunch of orange instead.
High-five for reader/commenter/professional back-up singer reillocity, for calling the world’s attention to this.
| The Colbert Report | Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c | |||
| Bill James | ||||
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Father of Us All Bill James has (a) written a book called Popular Crime and (b) endeavored to promote said book via some kind of American television program.
You fill in the blanks.
Executive Summary: The KC Star’s Royals blogger, Lee Judge, recently criticized Wilson Betemit for not taking an 81-mph slider in the ribs with the bases loaded. In order to lend the heft of authority to his criticism, Mr. Judge then decided to see what an 81-mph slider to the ribs felt like. This is Mr. Judge’s superlative video tale of journalistic integrity and a large, red welt.
(Frog-punch in the arm: BBTF)
Remember Feast Days? They’re back. At least for one glorious Friday afternoon, when we rightfully celebrate.
Please remember: I’m no poet. I’m no Carson Cistulli.
Life: Willie friggin’ Mays. Fourth all-time with 163.2 WAR. One of only five baseball players to eclipse the 150 WAR-mark. In center field, Mays flew.
Spiritual Exercise: Mays twice hit 50 home runs in a season; 51 in 1955, and 52, 10 years later, in 1965. Even time appreciated Willie Howard Mays, Jr.
A Prayer for Willie Mays:
Before my time,
Came Willie Mays.
A student of baseball history,
I learned: GOAT.
Willie Mays!
Before “The Catch,”
Before the home runs,
The MVP and World Series trophies,
Mays, a rookie in 1951, hitless in his first 12 Major League at-bats.
Lucky 13: a home run.
Against Warren Spahn, no less.
He’d hit 659 more, 17 more off Spahn.
Willie Mays!
New York, San Francisco, and back to New York.
A Giant, in baseball and in life.
Walk through AT&T Park
and look for Ted Williams’ words on the wall:
“They invented the All-Star game for Willie Mays.”
It’s true,
They did.
Eighty-years old today,
but forever just a Kid.
Say Hey!
Image courtesy blackathlete.net.
When he’s not playing minor league baseball for the Tampa Bay Rays, Emeel Salem sings “Katy Perry piano covers. You know, guy stuff.”
Me, I’m just glad I’m not the only one who enjoys Perry’s Teenage Dream. Massive tune, no matter what the haters say.
Enjoy. And make sure you thank Emeel on Twitter: @e_salem.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9iJKKXldVc&
Piano-sized props out to Rays Index. And Emeel. Definitely Emeel.
In this space we are duty-bound to pass along great manager tirades. What follows, however, comes to us from the ivory towers of academia, where they call managers “head coaches” but still make them wear uniforms. Texas head coach Auggie Garrido has lots of success at the major-college level, and I’d like to think that’s because he has a mouth that’s dirtier than Pig Pen’s bedpan. (You have probably surmised that the following walking tour of the undesirable neighborhoods of the King’s English is not safe for work, unless your place of employment is just really great.) Behold, respectfully:
At this point we are, necessarily and in abundant awe, left to wonder: which of the following is the most rousing, most soaring, most eagle-winged speech, delivered to the college man in need of a guiding paternal hand, in the annals of time? Your candidates …
A. “Win one for the Gipper!”
B. “If it was a boxing match and each individual took the beating that we took here today, I wouldn’t have to be doing this. I’d just come and visit your ass in the hospital and say, ‘When you get the fu*king wires off of your mouth from the broken jaw, and you can see again because your eyes are swollen now, and you can walk again because the guy just punched you in the gut 55 fu*king times,’ all I’d have to say is, ‘With all that, when you get better, we’ll have a little chat about how this guy just fu*king destroyed you.’ Okay?”
C. “Totally fu*king stupid!”
D. Both B and C.
Born in a blowout.
ottoneu creator Niv Shah wasn’t always a Cleveland Indians fan. In part one of this two-part piece, we covered the beginning of that night when Niv called friend Chad Young (currently blogging about being a member of the FanGraphs Experts League) and said he had some tickets to the game that night between the Rays and Indians.
Though there might have been some resistance to the strange formatting, the die is cast. The format has been decided. Chad got Niv to the game, it turned into a blowout, and yet they stayed to appreciate the Jake. Now it’s time to bring this night to its thrilling conclusion!
Eno Sarris: Do you remember a moment when you were like, hey wait a minute, let’s sit down? A player at the bat, or some cheering or something?
Niv Shah: i honestly don’t think we did. i remember a point where we were like, wait a minute, we might come back here – i think it was fryman’s homer in the 7th… definitely a home run in the 7th that was like “Wait… we are not down that much”
yeah
david f*cking lamb too
Other than signing Mattingly as their headcoach, doesn’t it seem like the Boys of Chavez Ravine have really opted for the hard way at every turn? I mean, it’s one thing to say “Damn the man I’m sticking to my guns,” but the squad, or should I say front office, really missed the boat Wednesday night.
Let me explain.
Wednesday night was an epic — no, make that an ever-so-mediocre — match up of Big Z Zambrano of the Chicago Cubs versus Ted Lilly of the Brooklyn Dodgers. Whaaaa? Yes, the BROOKLYN Dodgers. This was a mere novelty for everyone in attendance (I’d guesstimate all 200 of them) except for Vin Scully and Tommy Lasorda, who probably woke up at one point in the game quite confused thinking it was 1954 and they were back in Brooklyn. But to be fair, how much does Echo Park (home of the Dodgers) really differ from Brooklyn these days?
The team wore their powder blues and the music was a charming selection of era-appropriate selections, such as Eliminate the Negative (which also served as a funny double entendre for the team’s current affairs). But what it lacked and I hope they greatly consider is some old-timey announcing chock full of archaic expressions. How about …
“That Kemp, he may not be a flapper but he sure is swinging out there.”
“Zambrano is a pitching a gem, he’s the bee’s knees today on the mound.”
“This break to the bullpen is brought to you by State Farm because like a ‘Good Neighbor’ policy, protect yourself from — and by using — unilateral aggression”
…okay that’s a reach. But you get the point. If you’re going to do an old-timey game, use old-timey expressions.
What better way to strike a blow against French colonialism and for delicious tacos than by watching Aroldis Chapman use his fastball to ritually abuse something at the bidding of science’s most adorable pink polymer?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8_1O89RxHc&feature=player_embedded
My only fear is that that was actual human gastric acid inside the piñata. Nonetheless: Feliz Cinco de Mayo!
Almost as old as literature itself is the concept of the sequel. The great commercial success of the Iliad no doubt compelled Homer to hurriedly produce his Odyssey. Certainly, there would be no New Testament were it not for the widespread popularity of its Old counterpart. Modern Times™ gives us such franchises as Lord of the Rings and Star Wars — not to mention the Bill Cosby vehicle Leonard Part 6, whose creators ingeniously skipped parts one through five to give the impression of a successful run of films.
Lest the reader think even for a moment that NotGraphs is immune to the sequel, think not that, reader. For, with the widespread excitement surrounding yesterday’s post exploring the similarities between American ubermenschen Tommy Hanson and Timothy Busfield, we’ve not been able to restrain ourselves.
Accordingly, we offer you the above, a comparative study between Met knuckleballer R.A. Dickey and a Danny Concannon-era Tim (né Timothy) Busfield.
Is it as powerful a work as our original Busfield Lookalike post? That’s not for me to say, reader. But these bills for Cristal by the case and suites presidential or otherwise — they aren’t paying themselves, is what I mean to say.
Total noogie to Joe Pawlikowski for reasons I’m not at liberty to share.