Nickname Seeks Former Player: Vote on “A Garbage Truck That Runs on Lightning”

The nomination process, which was, at heart, a bacchanal of trash and thunderclaps, is complete. Now all that remains is the voting, which will be supervised by the Lidless Eye of Right-Wise Outcomes. You, ballotteer, are tasked with choosing among the chosen. Which of the 10 baseball-ists to follow should forevermore be known as “A Garbage Truck That Runs on Lightning”?

Vote carefully, citizens, for ward heelers are authorized to slaughter you on whim …

Thank you for exercising the franchise.