MLB TeeVee: Leave It To Weaver

This is the third in a series of short excerpts from MLB Network’s entirely imaginary new fall sitcoms. More details here.

Today’s show: LEAVE IT TO WEAVER

[scrippet]
INT. WEAVER HOUSE — DAY

MR. WEAVER
Boys, can you come down here?

JEFF and JERED race down the stairs.

JEFF
Yes, Pop?

MR. WEAVER
Now, Jered, I heard a terrible rumor down at the drug store today.

JERED
Golly gee, Dad. I swear I was only drinking. And why shouldn’t I be able to celebrate my no-hitter?

MR. WEAVER
That’s not what I’m talking about. Your mother and I said that you couldn’t go to the game until you cleaned your room, and while you were dominating the Twins last week, I opened your bedroom door, and it was a mess. You’re in big trouble, young man.

JERED
Dad, I pitched a no-hitter.

JEFF
Yeah, Dad, he pitched a no-hitter!

MR. WEAVER
I don’t know why you always defend your brother, Jeff. He replaced you in the Angels’ starting rotation!

JEFF
I earned over forty million dollars playing professional baseball. I can’t really be too bitter about it.

MR. WEAVER
And yet you still don’t pay any rent. You know what, it’s not worth it. I don’t care anymore. Why couldn’t the two of you be polite, dependable adults like your good friend and former Angel Eddie Haskell? I mean Chad Curtis.
[/scrippet]

(More on Chad Curtis.)