It Is Not Tax Day, Cistulli; It Is Jackie Robinson Day

apos Jackie Taxes

“April 15 approaches,” I said. “That is Jackie Robinson Day!”

“It is no such thing,” sniffed Cistulli. “It is Tax Day. Tax Day is when monies are seized for purposes of providing Al Qaeda with fresh breast milk and access to Head Start Programs. It is good that this is done because I prefer Al Qaeda to Jackie Robinson. Hail Satan. Praise be to Al Qaeda.”

“But, Cistulli,” I implored. “Jackie Robinson was a man of immense courage, dignity and historical import. How can you say such things?!”

“He was not,” Cistulli sniffed. “He was scarcely a man. I am a man. Look at this enemy-combatant chest hair ‘neath my radical’s tunic. Quislings unite! Jackie Robinson is someone I actively disrespect!”

“Cistulli, I must object–”

Then he ravished me.

But I — I! — created a NotGraphs category called “Cistulli. F__k that guy.”

Happy Jackie Robinson Day, everyone but Cistulli.

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Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.

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Bradley Woodrum
Guest

I’ll never forget the day Jackie Robinson’s legs exploded as he tried to slide into a crisp Form 1040: U.S. Individual Income Tax Return form. It was Jackie Robinson Day.

The day Dayn Perry was ravished. And probably fired too.

Mr. Observant
Guest
Mr. Observant

Goodness, how many times will be be before Bobo Cistulli’s ravishments of said author will not longer have the air of a soiling and be an expression of mutual passion and a celebration of the male form?

Mr. Observant
Guest
Mr. Observant

No longer. Ugh. My bad