Hoarders gonna hoard

Have you ever given any thought to what happens to a baseball bat after it breaks? After a Roy Halladay cut fastball in on the hands leaves what was once a pristine Louisville Slugger in two or three pieces?

Me neither, but good talk. I’ll see you on Tuesday.

In all seriousness, prepare to be wowed, as I was, because if you’re looking for the perfect Christmas gift for the sushi and baseball lover in your life, I’ve found it. You see, the Japanese, the fine, pioneering and resourceful people that they are, aren’t just tossing broken bats from the Nippon Professional Baseball league into the trash. Instead, Hyozaemon Corporation, Japan’s leading chopsticks producer, recycles the broken bats, turns them into miniature baseball bat chopsticks, adorns them with your favourite NPB logo, and sells them to you, the grateful consumer. Now that’s “green” I can get behind.

I don’t know about you, but after partaking in my very own baseball road trip of a lifetime this past summer, where I visited all 30 MLB stadiums in 55 days, my next baseball journey involves a flight across the world, and a visit to the Tokyo Dome. There’s nothing I want more than to sit back, watch the Yomiuri Giants, and eat some sushi using my very own “Kattobashi.”

That’s what the chopsticks are called; a play on “Kattobase!“, Japanese for “Get a big hit!”, and “Hashi,” good old chopsticks.

At the end of the day, I’m a hoarder. I own a ridiculous amount of Toronto Blue Jays memorabilia, most of which I have absolutely zero use for, but that I just can’t find in me to part with. Chopsticks that look like baseball bats? With my favourite team’s logo on them? For only $15.25 CAD, plus shipping? Oh yeah, I’d definitely buy that.

Because hoarders gonna hoard.