First Paragraphs Of Greatness

From Michael Wray at Jays Journal:

Thanks to a poor lifestyle decision when it was announced on Friday night that Marcus Stroman had been called up by the Toronto Blue Jays and would start on Saturday I was hugging my bathroom’s toilet bowl. By the time I came to my senses, Stroman was already into his fifth inning of work and I had missed what sounded like a spectacular start.

Because we don’t skimp on research here at NotGraphs, let’s figure out exactly how long Michael Wray was on the toilet. Shi Davidi from Sportsnet tweets about Stroman’s recall at 12:38 AM Saturday morning:

#BlueJays lose second in a row as they recall Marcus Stroman to join rotation: http://t.co/MWShQDEOAW

— Shi Davidi (@ShiDavidi) May 31, 2014

The Blue Jays gameday feed seems to indicate that the fifth inning ended at 2:25 PM:

Five Ks through innings of one-run ball for Stroman. He's at 58 pitches.

— Blue Jays Gameday (@TORGameday) May 31, 2014

Wray claims to have recovered sometime during that inning… so let’s approximate and say 2:15.

That puts him on the toilet for at least 13 hours and 37 minutes. I don’t know if it’s Guinness Book worthy… but, nice work, Michael Wray.