Extry, Extry: The 2011 Rays Will Beat Your Ass

This slice o’ genius over at DRaysBay is the best bit of Internetty-sportsy deconstruction I’ve run across since this … or maybe this.

Anyhow, this blessed little photo mash-up tells the story better than I can …

That, folks, is GomesRage, and despite what Reds fans might tell you, GomesRage is alive and well at the Trop. I don’t want to over-summarize and dull the wonders to be found within this featured link, but let’s just say the 2011 Rays, despite a talent exodus and budget so tight that a strategic default on a delivery pizza is a realistic possibility, can still throw the beefs. As you’ll see and savor, the post’s author, CBJones, proves it with fancy numbers, including Acronym of This and Any Other Millennium BRAWLFENSE. Even if it weren’t an acronym, BRAWLFENSE demands to be capitalized!

In a related matter, the NotGraphs Investigative Reporting Investigation Team has uncovered footage of the 2011 Rays at work and play in the mean streets of St. Pete:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXPiIuKBiVA

(Thanks to cherished reader Cooper Toledo and his awesome name for the heads-up. And, yes, it’s apparently On-Field Violence Day here at NotGraphs. Celebrate it with someone you loathe!)





Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.

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Chris
13 years ago

wow, just wow, that was an amazing article. This had to be my favorite part though:

“If Kevin Youkilis is the Greek God of Walks, then Jonny Gomes is a nuclear bomb filled with Grilled Stuft Burritos wrapped in bacon. (Trust me, that’s better.)”