apos Here at NotGraphs, I like to think we’re in the business of educating. (Like most educators, we’re also paid very, very handsomely.) We’re here to educate on some of the less nerdy wonders of baseball, the game we all hold closest to our bosom. To educate on, sometimes, certain wonders found on the internet that are tied to baseball in only the loosest of ways.
Like what you’re about to watch. (See what I did there?)
Below is the transcript of a recent instant message conversation I had with a good friend of mine, who I’ll call NotKien …
Bro. Go to YouTube. Search “Teach me how to Dougie Chris Brown.” Watch the video. Tell me what you see.
I, of course, obliged.
In the video that’s been viewed 8 million times, I see Chris Brown doing the Dougie. IN A BLUE JAYS HAT!!!1
HELLS YEAH!!! Think of ALLLLLLL THE team caps this dude could be wearing. He chooses a JAYS cap. Pretty cool. I have an ounce more respect for him.
Me too. And if you look closely, one of the guys in Brown’s entourage is also wearing a Blue Jays cap.
You’re right. and i don’t even think this club is in Toronto.
The transcript and video above prove three things:
1) We’ve got a bit of an inferiority complex up in Toronto. Is it obvious?
2) Chris Brown wearing a Blue Jays cap, as proven, will go a long way in rebuilding his tarnished image up in the great white north.
3) Chris Brown has mastered the Dougie.
I trust you’ll use the above video to either: a) buy a Blue Jays cap; or b) emulate Brown, and perfect your Dougie, too.
Because, when you think about it, there can’t be anything much more amusing than watching a baseball nerd do the Dougie. No, seriously, think about it.
In closing, Dayn Perry was right: The “Apropos of Nothing” category is the best category of them all.
Navin Vaswani is a replacement-level writer. Follow him on Twitter.