Carson “Motherf***ing” Cistulli’s Pre-Blog Speech

A leaked recording of Ron Washington’s profanity-laced pep talk from before game seven of the World Series has caused quite a stir on the web (NSFW):

Ron Washington’s Game 7 Clubhouse Speech from JoeSportsFan.com on Vimeo.

The Texas Rangers are reported to be livid that this speech — second only to the St. Crispin’s Day Speech from Shakespeare’s Henry v among the greatest inspirational speeches of all time — was released for public consumption.

Little does anyone know that Washington actually borrowed large portions of his speech from a speech given by NotGraphs’s Steadfast Guardian, Carson Cistulli, before the baseball action of game 162 on Wednesday, September 28.

As you will note, however, Cistulli’s speech struck a slightly different tone:

Cistulli: Hey fellas, I just want to take a minute and, um, this is what we waited for all f***ing year. To get to this point. You know, when the season started I told you guys to keep your titles to one line. One f***ing line! We followed this convention the whole goddamn year and there’s no reason to not do it now. If you don’t know how close you are to running over onto a second line, please use the preview feature. This is one of the most tremendous baseball blogs that I’ve ever had the pleasure of being a part of. I hope you guys feel the same way. There are a lot of champions at this website–those f***ing guys at FanGraphs are champions too and good champions also. They’re blogging for a modest sum. They ended up keeping their titles to one line. Tonight, this is what it’s about. We’re gonna go back out there tonight and I’m gonna expect you guys to stop doing anything different than what you’ve been doing all f***ing year. Enjoy yourself, have fun, do what you gotta do, and like I told you, at this point it’s all about focus. And you’ve been great at that and you’ve always had each others’ backs. That’s what we gotta continue to do: have each others’ back. That’s all it is…We can keep our titles to one motherf***ing line. Ain’t no doubt about it. We can beat those motherf***ers over there. No doubt about it. But I can tell you this: they over there saying the same motherf***ing thing. Why? Because they a champion too. And we’re a motherf***ing champion. But we know we can outblog those c***s***ers. They’re not so sure about outblogging us.