Dickey, Anthopoulos Optimistic
In pathetic fulfillment of Patrick Dubuque’s NotGraphs Villanelle Challenge™…
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The Canadian Press, Chris Young / AP
R.A. & A.A. are optimistic
the Jays’ window widely splayed —
they’ve got they’re own heuristic.
Author Archive
World’s Only Corn Palace Hates Baseball
Back in October, The Colbert Report featured a special report on how a drought in the US heartland was threatening the prestige of the World’s Only Corn Palace, located in Mitchell, South Dakota.
Mitchell, South Dakota’s Corn Palace: More Decadent Than Las Vegas?
Due to reasons stemming from the fact that my significant other grew up in Mitchell, South Dakota, I am presently in Mitchell, less than a mile, even, from said (and World’s Only) Corn Palace. So, I’m going to write about it.
A Brief History of the World’s Only Corn Palace
The first iteration of the Corn Palace was built in 1892 “as a way to prove to the world that South Dakota had a healthy agricultural climate,” an issue which had been hotly debated in the very real agricultural climate salons of the 1880s prior to the erection of this first virile — and quite flammable — Corn Palace, which was then and remains to this day the World’s Only Corn Palace.
Since its inception, it has featured new murals on its outer walls on an almost yearly basis, with exceptions coming during the years of the World Wars (when some of the murals were partially painted to save valuable corn for the war efforts), and times of great laziness, like 1982.
What the World’s Only Corn Palace Has to Do With the World’s Only Worthwhile Sport, AKA Baseball
Read the rest of this entry »
Seattle Mariners Offseason Summary
Below is a (perhaps depressing) summary of the Seattle Mariners’ offseason wherein I have made extensive use of the “Mariners Rumors” page at MLB Trade Rumors. Please note: I love you, Mariners Fans; I feel your pain, if you are, in fact feeling pain regarding this offseason. Something similar could be done about my Milwaukee Brewers, but the Brewers haven’t been linked to anywhere near the number of blockbuster moves (or any kind of moves) that the M’s have. And so…
Festivities after the jump!
All 30 MLB Teams’ Offseasons [So Far] Summarized in 5 Words or Less
Arizona Diamondbacks: What is a Didi Gregorius?
Atlanta Braves: Perfect BJ
Baltimore Orioles: McLouth’d!
Boston Red Sox: Fear of Commitment
Chicago Cubs: Binders Full of Bargains
Chicago White Sox: Three Years of Jeff Keppinger
Cincinnati Reds: She Is That Shin-Soo Choo
Totally Unaltered Tweet: Dickey to Pitch Guts
I am not Carson Cistulli, but this is a tweet by John Lott that is in-no-way altered from the original:
Here is what that would look like, maybe, should Dickey have pitched his guts for the Mets:
Would Sabermetric Principles Be as Fun If Applied to Other Things In Life?
I’m sure this question has been asked before. By all of us. Maybe on an everyday basis, even.
An e-comic strip, submitted by reader Aaron E., imagines what the application of sabermetric principles would produce if applied to comic books:
I Want Lipstick!
Tis the season to give, receive, and be thankful, I guess.
Many people will be getting or have already gotten something other than what they wanted this year, however — and they’re not afraid to tell you about it!
Carlos Gomez: Friend & Foe to Animals
As my colleague David G. Temple discovered yesterday, the Twitter account of Milwaukee Brewers CF Carlos Gomez is a veritable visual muse.
In addition to revealing an unlikely friendship with Manny Ramirez, The TwitPix of CarGoII reveal his enigmatic relationship with animals. Bear witness:
W/ Emú: Hunting buddy or future prey?
Emú, I will soon decide
to shoot you or make you
my friend.
So much depends on
whether you can smell better
animals than you
to eat
because if I shoot you
I will not want to eat
your nasty flesh —
your feathers are too sharp
to wear.
I have such smooth skin,
Emú.
So, what can you sniff,
coarse-wingéd friend?
Rabbit? Duck? Turkey or cow?
Tell me now, because too soon
what you sniff will be hot metal dust,
your own blood,
wasted meat,
champaign.
David Price Reverses Roles, Creeps on Fans
David Price is active on Twitter.
Today, one so-called “Italian” might be thinking that David Price is a little too active on twitter.
@davidprice14 suave!!! Sneak a pic!!
— Scotty Saunier (@scottygolf1) December 12, 2012
lol ok RT @scottygolf1: @davidprice14 suave!!! Sneak a pic!! lockerz.com/s/268415276
— David Price (@DAVIDprice14) December 12, 2012
@LoTheGooner, the Innocent Creeped-Upon
(Photo Credit: David Price)
Mr. Price, this behavior is not becoming of a Cy Young Award winner, a professional athlete of your caliber, a man of your social standing and education, a specimen of your cut! 😉
How dare you violate the privacy of an everyday person! You, a professional athlete, whose privacy is surely never violated, pics of whose uniformed ass are surely never tweeted by common folk!
I think you should be stripped of your Cy Young Award, Mr. Price. In fact, I think you should be stripped and then photographed and then those photos should be tweeted to the whole world! Tit for tat! Next time let a Goon enjoy his Hollandaise-soaked crepes in peace, Mr. Price!
Rally the @LoTheGooners of the world! Take back Twitter from jerks like David Price! Huzzah and bully!
Jay[ton] Mohr Weighs In
In case you missed it in the Twitter explosion last night, Jay Mohr, actor and comedian (whose name is eerily similar to that of Kansas City Royals GM Dayton Moore), weighed in on the Royals-Rays trade that sent James Shields to KC.
The Kansas City Royals just pulled off a straight bank robbery. Shields and Davis for Myers is INCREDIBLE for #royals fans.
— Jay Mohr (@jaymohr37) December 10, 2012
He followed it up with several other tweets, all of which point to a non-idiotic (IMHO) opinion — but one that is very, very incomplete.
Consider this Tweet: