Apply to the Hunter Pence School of Just Kinda Flailing at It

penceflail

Not getting the results you want at the plate? Tried all those fad swing tools without any progress? Had enough of your father’s disappointed looks?

Then register today for the Hunter Pence School of Just Kinda Flailing at It.

Here at the Hunter Pence School of Just Kinda Flailing at It, we understand the frustrations that can come with trying to hit for power with a traditional swing. Our founder, Hunter Pence, had that frustration, too. That’s why he developed this revolutionary new approach to hitting. It may look unorthodox, but the results are proven.

Just one 10-week course at the Hunter Pence School of Just Kinda Flailing at It will have you knocking balls over the wall while looking like an anthropomorphic bowl of Jell-O in no time. Results are guaranteed, or your money back.

Don’t settle for weak grounders to third. Don’t waste time trying to model your swing after Ted Williams’. Enroll at the Hunter Pence School of Just Kinda Flailing at It, and see your game transform. Teammates and opponents might say you hit like a windsock with a significant tear in it, but they’ll be saying it as they watch balls go over the fence.

Call now. Special financing is available in most states.





David G. Temple is the Managing Editor of TechGraphs and a contributor to FanGraphs, NotGraphs and The Hardball Times. He hosts the award-eligible podcast Stealing Home. Dayn Perry once called him a "Bible Made of Lasers." Follow him on Twitter @davidgtemple.

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The Return of Rambo Diaz
8 years ago

Hunter Pence is just built for GIF-making.