Youk, Tebow, Taibbi and the Death of Simile

Rolling Stone’s Matt Taibbi in 2009: “Whereas a guy like Teixeira was born with a swing so gorgeous you want to paint it, Youkilis fighting a middle reliever to a nine-pitch walk looks like a rhinoceros trying to fuck a washing machine.”

Rolling Stone’s Matt Taibbi in 2012: “Tim Tebow trying to throw a forward pass is like a moose trying to fuck a washing machine.”

Mr. Taibbi is a fairly prolific lad, so in some ways it’s excusable not to have a running mental catalog of the jokes one has cracked. Still, Taibbi’s dragging a simile howling from the vaults is like watching a washing machine trying to fuck sports.