Yo Momma Jokes For Your Fantasy Baseball Auction
Yo momma’s so cheap, she didn’t even want to pay $35 for Troy Tulowitzki.
Yo momma’s so old, she remembers when Jamie Moyer was in his thirties.
Yo momma’s so poor, she can’t even afford fake auction money.
Yo momma’s so stupid, she thinks Jordan Zimmermann’s last name only has one N.
Yo momma’s so lazy, she didn’t make her own spreadsheet.
Yo momma’s so ugly, she made this awesome real-time-updated draft board I set up to work on my TV set crack in half.
Yo momma’s so fat, I couldn’t even see behind her, and notice you were holding up your hand to bid on Asdrubal Cabrera. So he went for $10 to someone else. Sorry. There are other decent shortstops available, though.
Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.
Yo momma’s so fat, Bartolo Colon for $3