Villanelle: Fantasy Choices I Have Made
As Villanelle Week continues, one more from me…
Fantasy Choices I Have Made
Fantasy choices I have made
I’ve drafted Travis Snider twice
In every league in which I’ve played
I got Reid Brignac in a trade
In which James Shields was the price*
Fantasy choices I have made
Kila Kaaihue made the grade
Greg Colbrunn sounded awfully nice
In too many years I’ve played
I drafted Manny, I’m afraid
In 2012, and for a price
So many choices I have made
A-Jax or Ellsbury, I have weighed
And dropped them both with bad advice
Before the years so great they played
Oh, Justin Duchscherer! I once prayed
He would come back. I rolled the dice
Fantasy choices I have made
I’ve mostly lost in leagues I’ve played
*Shields for Troy Glaus, Reid Brignac, and Ervin Santana. 2009.
Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.
Defeating Blachman’s how they roll
Because his choices aren’t good
And those choices take a toll
They got Andrus for charcoal
And that was the best they could
Defeating Blachman’s how they roll
Trade thoughs go up the flagpole
AJax now gone for firewood
And those choices take a toll
Like all laywers he has no soul
They seek to stop him and do good
Defeating Blachman’s how they roll
He loses, though he’s on FG’s payroll
The Cameronian advice not understood
And those choices take a toll
So now it’s them I must extol
Until sued for all the falsehood
Defeating Blachman’s how they roll
And those choices take a toll
–JRM