Spotted: The Author, Almost Supporting Team Italy

In an attempt to associate himself with something that is both larger and more sexy than his own person, the author has decided he will support Team Italy, which plays at 3pm ET against Mexico, in the World Baseball Classic.

Understanding, however, that naked displays of nationalism are irksome — and also that he is less real Italian, and more of what comedian Mike Birbiglia would call an “Olive Garden Italian” — the author has decided to express his support in the form of a comedy t-shirt (one which, in fact, appears to be officially licensed by the Rocky movie franchise).

That his life is a constant apology for itself, the author is entirely aware.