Shorter Baseball Columnists!
It’s time for another installment of “Shorter Baseball Columnists,” in which we read mainstream baseball columnists and marginalized bloggers like Murray Chass so you don’t have to! Let us begin!
Shorter Dan Shaughnessy: How dare John Henry’s wife update us on his recent medical crisis when the Red Sox aren’t in the playoffs!
Shorter Rick Reilly: Yuk, yuk, yuk!
Shorter Gerry Callahan: The Red Sox faltered down the stretch because the players are bad people.
Shorter Rob Parker: Jose Reyes lacks the integrity and personal courage of, say, a Rob Parker.
Shorter Rico Brogna: I have some opinions on Jose Reyes’s contract status, and, boy, those opinions are weird.
Shorter Murray Chass: Beer is stupid.
The “Shorter” approach to Internetty commentary traces back, as best as one can tell, to Daniel Davies.
Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.
In unrelated news, Peter Gammons’ twitter watch from last night reveals: “That is a good thong.” Good to know, Pete. Good to know.