Nerds Take Over Safeco: An Investigative Report

Nerds shall inherit the earth. But first, Safeco Field.

Saturday was the somewhat-annual USS Mariner and Lookout Landing trip to Safeco to watch the Mariners, and I was in attendance. Needless to say, when a bunch of us nerds get together, things are going to get weird. With that in mind, here’s some things of note about Nerds at a Baseball Game, 2012.

• Even though it was a group of nerds, I was the only one wearing a FanGraphs t-shirt. I mean, I know it’s a Mariners game and people want to show their team spirit, but some teams are more important.

• The folks sitting behind me — without prompting — said they like the way that the host of FanGraphs Audio said “Cespedes.” Unfortunately for said host, the fans did not know his name, rendering his life’s work pointless. Afforementioned host will continue to need daily motivation from Twitter.

• For the sponsored first pitch, yellow and pink blobs that looked like some sort of mouse walked — nay, danced — out to the mound. It was beyond creepy.

• Did you know Ichiro’s favorite actress is Sandra Bullock? I assume he saw her in Miss Congeniality 2 and fell in love.

• Simple Kind of Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd is one of the least intimidating and motivating at-bat songs in the majors. However, it’s still a quietly good song. So, of course, that’s what Dustin Ackley went with.