MLB TeeVee: SeinFuld

This is the second in a series of short excerpts from MLB Network’s entirely imaginary new fall sitcoms. More details here.

Today’s show: SEINFULD

[scrippet]
INT. RAYS DUGOUT — DAY

SAM and GEORGE are sitting on the bench.

SAM
Joe Maddon caught me.

GEORGE
He caught you?

SAM
Yeah, he caught me.

GEORGE
Oh, he’s caught me dozens of times. I always think I’m alone, but then, there he is. It’s very embarrassing. But it’s hard to stay occupied when you’re a bench player. I get bored.

SAM
No, idiot. He caught me trying to learn how to throw a knuckleball.

GEORGE
I’ve never heard that euphemism before.

SAM
It’s not a euphemism. I’m trying to learn how to throw a knuckleball in order to extend my career, since it seems like I am not destined to stay healthy and productive for long enough stretches as an outfielder, despite my excellent defense, solid batting eye, surprising power, and unique biographical details that make me a fan favorite among the well-educated and sabermetrically-aware baseball fans.

GEORGE
I thought you were talking about something else.

SAM
Yes, I figured that out.
[/scrippet]