J.Q. Arencibia Bitter About Being Fired From Job As Accountant
Following his brother’s complaints about the media in Toronto making him out to be a bad guy, J.Q. Arencibia had this to say about his firing as an accountant at a leading firm:
I didn’t expect going in that my numbers were going to be analyzed like that. You know, I think it’s pretty ridiculous that I was singled out as the villain of the office when all I did was botch everyone’s tax return. I showed up, I did my job, or at least I tried to, and then people in the “human resources department” start looking at you like you’re some kind of monster for doing an extremely poor job at calculating things, and then they start telling other people, and my secretary stopped following me on Twitter, and I did end up speaking to my boss about all of this, but he just said it came along with the territory of being an accountant. I thought I was going to be part of the future of this firm and not be made a scapegoat just because all of the clients left after they got audited, and demanded their money back. By describing the work I did as “shoddy” and “bad,” I really considered legal action. They defamed me. I tried to file a suit against them, but I messed that up too. But, you know what, it’s all in the past. Now I’m doing what I love to do, at home, and even though no one’s paying me to file these tax returns on behalf of imaginary people and businesses, it’s a lot of fun, the atmosphere is great, and at least there’s no more poutine. And that’s all I have to say.
Jeremy Blachman is the author of Anonymous Lawyer, a satirical novel that should make people who didn't go to law school feel good about their life choices. Read more at McSweeney's or elsewhere. He likes e-mail.
JQ ARNECIBA IZ A SSSHIT ACCOUNTANT. JUSST LIKE HIS BROHTER AT BASEBALL. In other news, trying to sound like an idiot is harder than you might think.