Designated Litter
In this photo, my cat Irwin is wearing my Houston Astros ice cream helmet. I got this helmet at a game on my 27th birthday, and it once contained Blue Bell Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream (the best ice cream in the world, made in Brenham, Texas). Irwin doesn’t want to wear the helmet, and it took me awhile to get it on, but I make him wear it anyway because he’s my cat and I can make him do things like wear hats. I could have worn the hat instead, but I know I can just have Irwin do it. In exchange for his pride, I give him food, clean up his poop, and scratch his cheeks. I like to think he puts up with it because he loves me, but it might be because he doesn’t have a choice — he knows he can’t beat me up or else he wouldn’t have an owner at all.
In the metaphor I’m constructing, the part of Irwin is played by the Houston Astros and the part of me is played by Bud Selig and the part of the ice cream helmet is played by the American League.
Summer Anne Burton is a writer and illustrator living in Austin, Texas. She is drawing pictures of Every Hall of Famer.
“it once contained Blue Bell Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream (the best ice cream in the world, made in Brenham, Texas)”
The truth. My boys and I few Rangers helmets that used to hold just this ice cream which is, most assuredly, one of the greatest edible substances in the world.