Harvard’s Baseball Team Performs “Call Me Maybe”

1. I actually had to google Carly Rae Jepsen, the artist behind this gummy candy of a song — I had heard the name but had no idea how to identify her otherwise. I found out a bunch of stuff, like: she’s 26 (about ten years older than I figured when I heard the song). She placed third in the fifth season of Canadian Idol, which is, um, Canada’s version of American Idol (this is in keeping with a long tradition of non-winning finalists going on to more success after Idol than the winners, except for Kelly Clarkson, who is obviously the best thing that has/will ever come of that atrocious television show). She was the first musician signed to Justin Bieber’s Schoolboy Records, supposedly after the kid heard her sing and demanded her for his kingdom. She actually is quite pretty, in that kind of approachable (read: brunette) way that other girls aren’t spiteful about. She grew up on James Taylor, which I did as well, so I sympathize with that, but now “spins” La Roux and Kimbra, and I don’t know what those things are.

2. As for Harvard’s baseball team, I learned that they were ranked 233rd among Div I NCAA teams this past season, going 12-30 during the season with a team batting average of .285, an OBP of .350, and a slugging percentage of .368. You know what, though? These guys aren’t getting paid. Baseball isn’t their job and they’re probably pretty good at doing what all college athletes are theoretically at school for anyway (learnin’ and shit). I’m happy for them that despite a pretty dismal season, they decided to choreograph this dance routine to Carly Rae Jepsen’s Call Me Maybe.

3. But more than that, I’m happy for all of us that we get to watch it. It is truly a delight to behold, a present in YouTube form, bound to inspire Actual Smiling — unless your face is paralyzed, in which case, I’m sorry, and I hope you’re smiling on the inside! This is great, really. Thank you, handsome college dudes.