Five MLB Rumors No One’s Talking About
December 7, 2012
As reliable content-generator and hot, sexy tuba-ist David Temple noted yesterday in these pages, this year’s Winter Meetings — at which Meetings the author, who is a real-live baseball writer now, was actually present — were decidedly yawn-worthy in terms of deals that were actually made. That having been said (and with due respect to Tim Dierkes et al.), there are a number of rumors that have been entirely ignored by the sporting media — rumors about which any reasonable person is likely to ask “Why is no one talking about this???”
Rumors like these five, specifically:
Bryan LaHair’s surname is French for “The Hair.”
The Rockies front office is basically, like, “whatever” now.
There are actually multiple Ken Rosenthals.
Kelly Gruber’s name is woefully absent from HOF ballots.
This guy has a game-used Val Pascucci jersey.
Carson Cistulli has published a book of aphorisms called Spirited Ejaculations of a New Enthusiast.
It’s “real-life,” not “real-live.” This is your second citation. A third strike will result in the suspension of your already dubious BBWAA credentials.
In the second sentence you refer to the event as a citation. In the third sentence you refer to the event as a strike…isn’t that, like, wrong or something?
It’s “real, live.” Grammar Police BUSTED!