Feast of St. Stewart the Menacing

Today, February 19th, we remember and celebrate the life of Stewart the Menacing.

Life: Stewart is known for his intimidating mound presence and durability. With the Oakland teams of the late-80s, he posted four consecutive 20-win seasons. While not necessarily exceptional on rate basis — never, for example, leading the league in ERA or ERA+ — he led all pitchers with 1061.2 IP over his four-year peak.

Prayer

On August 1st, 1987, you killed
a career-best 14 batters against Minnesota.
Your personal record for killing batters
in a season is 205, also in 1987 —
i.e. the same year you killed an average
of 7.1 batters per nine innings.

You maintain that your greatest regret
is killing Reggie Jackson,
with whom you famously co-managed
an Oakland-area Salvation Army.

The world will never forget
the time you killed Ernest Riles
in the ninth inning
of a World Series shutout,
his body twisting grotesquely
yet comically
like in an actual game of Twister.