Congrats, Mr. Axford
Ignore, for the moment and if you’re able, the hipster virulence in the belowly embedded action-video footage — ignore Those Who Ruin Everything — and instead focus on what’s important and right-wise: that John Axford has been named the Mustached American of the Year:
While Mr. Axford is not American, he indubitably embodies the American spirit, particularly in his choice of tailored vests. However, he is not mustached. He is mustachioed.
He is pistols at dawn. He is making his fortune by importing silk garments and exotic spices. He is invading the Duchess’s boudoir. He is making love to love.
(Butterfly kisses: Hall of Very Good)
Handsome Dayn Perry can be found making love to the reader at CBSSports.com's Eye on Baseball. He is available for all your Twitter needs.
This post now holds the record for “Fewest words needed to tell that Dayn Perry wrote it,” with one word and a comma
Thanks! Or, alternatively, how dare you insult me!
The sincerest of compliments.