CJ Wilson Is a Pranking Fool
Somehow this one slipped between the cracks — C.J. Wilson pranked Mike Napoli… by putting the catcher’s phone number on twitter. He wasn’t particularly contrite about it afterwards either:
Perhaps “Nap Nap Weiner” will take an item off of this list of suggested revenge pranks?
* Slip some Jose Cuervo in his breakfast smoothie. Tell him it’s the newest immunity boost from the mountains of Peru.
* Replace the needle on his Technics with an actual needle before a gig.
* Sponsor a page of his on a statistics site with unflattering statistical nuggets listed prominently.
* Google bomb Wilson’s results page by promoting the “cjwilsonisadouche” account with SEO tactics.
* Have a shirt made with Wilson’s phone number on it. Print 20,000 of them and have friends hand them out at the next Rangers — Angels meeting.
* Start a forum devoted to discussing Wilson’s girlfriend, fictional or real. Oh, wait.
* Push the meme on all platforms.
* Buy a billboard in Los Angeles. List all of Wilson’s favorite out-of-the-way restaurants and hang out spots, and invite the city to come find him any time.
* Link his google calendar to the scoreboard for a game or until he notices.
* Pose as Wilson and post on music forums about how awesome the band Lit is.
With a phone full of pictures of pitchers' fingers, strange beers, and his two toddler sons, Eno Sarris can be found at the ballpark or a brewery most days. Read him here, writing about the A's or Giants at The Athletic, or about beer at October. Follow him on Twitter @enosarris if you can handle the sandwiches and inanity.
I seriously can’t have my fill of Lit jokes. Keep ’em coming!