What if Ricky Romero didn’t have the American League’s highest walk rate, and its highest ERA. What if Romero pitched like he did in 2010. What if the Blue Jays drafted Troy Tulowitzki, and not Romero. (Editor’s note: We use that one every year.) What if Jose Bautista didn’t get off to such a slow start. What if Joey Bats didn’t hurt his wrist.

What if Kelly Johnson didn’t strike out so often. What if the Blue Jays kept Aaron Hill. What if Adam Lind was more than a one-year wonder. What if Yunel Escobar’s .298 OBP wasn’t 56 points below his career average. What if Escobar could be consistent; how good could he be?

What if Dustin McGowan — ha! — and Jesse Litsch were healthy. What if Kyle Drabek didn’t need a second Tommy John surgery. What if Drew Hutchison didn’t need his first. What if Brett Cecil found the two missing miles per hour on his fastball. What if Luis Perez didn’t tear his ulnar collateral ligament. What if Brandon Morrow started more than just 16 games.

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That play, Manny Machado to Mark Reynolds, Monday afternoon in Toronto, was one of the many manifestations of Orioles Magic. I saw it. I felt it. Our Investigative Reporting Investigation Team confirmed it: “Yep, that’s what Orioles Magic looks like,” they reported. Something — someone — kept Reynolds’ toe on the bag.

It’s obvious, especially after Mississippi Matt Smith’s excellent post, I Cannot Use This Website to Explain the Baltimore Orioles, that there’s a higher power at work here. Something greater than all of us. Something we’ll never understand. Jesus, probably. And now that I’ve thought about it, He’s leading us — all of us — to a greater common good, to something that brings all of us together, united in baseball: a potential defeat of the New York Yankees. (Except if it’s the Red Sox who beat them. Then we all lose. Well, except Boston. You see my point.)

It’s not that I’m rooting for the Orioles. I’m too shocked, jealous, and bitter about their random success to root for them. But if the Blue Jays can’t win, I’d rather the Yankees didn’t. That’s just the way I live my life. So the Orioles have become a means to an end.

My point is: That was a fantastic play by Machado and Reynolds. Believe.

GIF credit: Professional GIFmaker @SAJagfire.

Nick Punto inexplicably dives headfirst into first base on a routine groundout to the shortstop

— Mark Saxon (@markasaxon) August 31, 2012

“You can’t reason with grit,” Nick Punto told NotGraphs’ Investigative Reporting Investigation Team. And who are we to argue with Nick Punto?

The Baltimore Orioles are 71-57. The Toronto Blue Jays are 57-71. I suspected this was the case after last night’s action; I felt a disturbance in the proverbial force. The Orioles have a -39 run differential, the Blue Jays -37. Life remains unfair. Baltimore starters have a 4.60 ERA. Toronto starters: 4.80. The Orioles’ bullpen has been money: a 3.03 ERA in 424.2 innings. The Blue Jays’ bullpen has been a nightmare: a 4.20 ERA, worst in the American League, in 405.1 innings. Bullpens matter. Baltimore is – somehow – 24-6 in one-run games, and 12-2 in extra innings. The Blue Jays are 9-20 in one-run games, and 6-6 in extra innings. The bottom line: the Orioles will play meaningful baseball in September, and the Blue Jays will not. Showalter Magic is real. I believe. In the AL East’s battle of the birds, the Orioles have won.

This troubles me, of course. Over the past few years, I’ve taken my fair share of shots at the Orioles. Seriously, I’ve talked a lot of shit. They were low-hanging fruit. It was so easy. Too easy. But the time for jokes has passed. And now, it’s time to look back, and reflect. Were the jokes – the #OriLOLes hashtag was a personal favorite – worth it?

I’ve thought long and hard about this. About calling Baltimore’s visits to the Rogers Centre “Guaranteed Win Night,” about the Orioles’ fiasco in South Korea, and Dan Duquette’s comments about the cut fastball. I’ve had a lot of good times at the Orioles’ expense. And, yet, here we are: the Blue Jays are now the butt of jokes; the Blue Jays are in last place.

I’m sorry, Baltimore, I apologize, but, after much introspection, yes, it was all worth it, goddamnit. Especially  the #OriLOLes hashtag. No regrets. The Orioles’ struggles made me feel alive. And fortunate. But good luck the rest of the way.

Image credit: Noisy Decent Graphics.

Between Colby Rasmus’ new ‘do, back-to-back losses — in which the Blue Jays were outscored 14-6 — to the Orioles, Jose Bautista again landing on the disabled list, and Kevin frigging Gregg striking out the side — Rasmus, Edwin Encarnacion, and Kelly Johnson — in the 9th inning Saturday night, I’ve hit bottom as a Toronto supporter. There’s only so much bullshit one man can take.

But, seriously, what the hell was Rasmus thinking? I know he’s struggling, but there had to have been another option. Other options. Somewhere, Tony La Russa — like the rest of us — is laughing.

What can I say. I preferred the long hair; the sick flow. I preferred Colbylocks.

Image credit: The Twitter feed of Mr. Ricky Romero.

I have an affinity for baseball-related hip-hop music, and the above — “Put Me in the Game” — comes to us from Athens, Alabama’s G-Side, as featured in 2K Sports’ MLB 2K12, which I recently bought in order to electronically change the fate of my beloved Blue Jays.

If you like the track, you can download it here. I checked; it isn’t available on iTunes.

Renowned hitmaker Edwin Encarnacion, born in the Dominican Republic, fluent in Spanish, spoke to Japan’s Yu Darvish Friday night without saying a word. Encarnacion’s bat flip — after a mighty  home run, a “no-doubter,” as the kids say — did all the talking. Nothing else needed to be said.

In eight at-bats against Darvish, Encarnacion has five hits, two of them home runs. It’s obvious to me, and anyone who visits FanGraphs: Encarnacion irrefutably  has Darvish’s number.

When winter is upon us up here in Toronto next month, and I look back on the Blue Jays’ 2012 season, one in which they will likely finish behind the Baltimore Orioles in the standings, I’ll remember Encarnacion’s T-Rexing ways, and his bat flips, as bright lights amid the darkness.

Gracias, Señor Encarnacion.

All praise be upon my friend Ian, @BlueJayHunter, for the GIF. Check out the latest on his Tumblr account — The Evolution of Edwin Encarnacion’s Bat Flip — and visit his website, The Blue Jay Hunter.

I have recently discovered Roar of the Tigers, and my life has improved immeasurably. Mostly due to the incredible illustrations of Quintin Berry, by Samara Pearlstein, below.

NotGraphs, meet Quintin Berry. Quintin Berry, NotGraphs.

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So, that happened Friday night, in beautiful San Francisco. AT&T Park, man. One of the best.

I’ve always assumed that it would be easier to support a mediocre baseball team if the stadium in which it played wasn’t a soulless slab of mostly concrete. Not that the Giants are mediocre — not at all. But I imagine 2005 through 2008 were more bearable for Giants fans because of AT&T Park.

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Even Cleveland Indians fans laughed.

Here’s the good news: only 13,843 souls, or how many were left of the smallest crowd in Minute Maid Park history, saw that. (On an aside: why the hell were there so many Nationals fans in Houston? I’m very confused.)

It’s been a tough season for me, personally, as a Blue Jays supporter. Everyone is injured. No, really, everyone. So, of late, I’ve done what everyone should do now and then, to know what life is like for those less fortunate: I’ve watched Astros games. In their entirety. And, believe me, I now truly realize how blessed I am. You almost have to believe in God to be an Astros fan.

If you’re out there, and you know Brad Mills, please hug him. For me. For all of us.