Now that Youk has been traded to the White Sox, I thought I’d take a look at the other offers that teams had on the table…

Orioles: Bullpen catcher / batting practice pitcher Rudy Arias.

Indians: Charles Nagy.

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“Great players don’t need a psychiatrist,” [Ozzie] Guillen said. “I didn’t see Pete Rose talking with any psychiatrist, Paul Molitor or all those guys.”

“I was from an era in baseball when Budweiser and vodka took care of the psychiatric things.” … “You fail, you get drunk and you come back the next day to see how good it feels. The psycho guys—the doctors—they never played this game. They never wore the uniform. They never came out of a slump. They’re not used to it, so how are they going to help?”

— Sporting News, 6/23/12

You know who else doesn’t need a doctor? Pitchers with torn ligaments. Great players don’t need orthopedic surgeons. I didn’t see Walter Johnson talking with any orthopedic surgeon, Christy Mathewson, Satchel Paige, any of those guys.

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Davey Johnson on Joe Maddon:

“I don’t know him that well, but I thought he was a weird wuss anyways.”

Link.

When did Davey Johnson become a grumpy old codger? Wasn’t he the first guy with a computer, looking for every edge he could get? Or, as a commenter on Baseball Think Factory said: “On the Mets broadcast they were talking about this and they said ’30 years ago Davey Johnson was Joe Maddon.'”

Because Fathers Day is a week-long holiday.

Yahoo had an article last week about the ten worst Father-Son duos in MLB history. I think this article is not terrific.

7. Jose Cano, P/Robinson Cano, 2B –
Jose Cano played in the big leagues for one year. He played with the Houston Astros in 1989. His record was 1-1 with a 5.09 ERA. Nothing special there. Robinson, however, is still active and is currently playing for the New York Yankees. Robinson is on track for a great career, as he’s batting a solid .307 and has already hit 152 homers.

4. Cal Ripken Sr., Manager/Cal Ripken Jr., 3B – Ripken Sr. spent 36 years, beginning in 1957 with the Baltimore Orioles organization. He spent 13 years in the Orioles’ farm system as a player, coach and scout. He spent very little time in the majors as a player. Cal Ripken Jr. played for the Baltimore Orioles from 1981-2001 and is one of baseball’s best. He was inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2007 after a stellar career.

1. Bobby Bonds, OF/Barry Bonds, OF –
I’m probably going to get killed for putting this father-son duo on this list, but I don’t care. Bobby Bonds played from 1968-1981 for eight different squads, including the San Francisco Giants and the 1978 Texas Rangers. He was a great hitter, and he retired with 1,886 hits and 332 homers. Barry Bonds played from 1986-2007 with the Pittsburgh Pirates and the San Francisco Giants. He retired with 2,935 hits and 762 homers. All those with an asterisk.

Um, Robinson Cano is pretty awesome, any duo with Cal Ripken as part of it can’t possibly rank in the ten worst, and Bonds isn’t even worth getting into.

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Are you a baseball player looking to get a divorce?

The law firm of Edwards & Associates has a web page specifically for you.

Divorce and Family Law for Professional Baseball Players

We have the experience in high-asset divorce to represent MLB players, including up-and-coming prospects who are waiting for a call-up from the minors. A major league career can be very lucrative, with average salaries around $3 million and an average MLB career of more than five years. With signing bonuses and guaranteed contracts, it’s certainly a good living.

We also understand the realities of baseball — the wear and tear of 162 games in 180 days (not including spring training or the playoffs), the long trips away from the wife and kids, and living life in the media fishbowl. Some marriages just aren’t built for that life.

When the marriage has broken down to the point of divorce, Edwards & Associates can represent either party (the ballplayer or the spouse) in contested proceedings. We handle the special issues for baseball players and their families:

Property division and alimony
Division of MLB pensions
Child custody and visitation
Determination of child support
Paternity suits

This makes me so proud to be licensed to practice law.*

*If any MLB players (or their wives!) are reading this and need someone to help with their divorce, please contact me to arrange a private consultation.

According to TMZ, Vladimir Guerrero pays over $25,000 in child support each month, for eight children with five different women.

[scrippet]
CHILD ONE
I tried to call and wish him a Happy Father’s Day, but the line was busy all day!

CHILD TWO
I kept getting his voice mail. And the mailbox was full.

CHILD THREE
I got him a Father’s Day card, but he said he already had three of the same card I bought. There simply aren’t enough unique Father’s Day cards. Hallmark, you suck.

CHILD FOUR
I think it’s almost my turn to see him again this Christmas. Too bad he won’t remember what I look like, since the last time it was my turn was 2004, and I was one.
[/scrippet]

The latest paternity lawsuit was filed by a woman named Heidy Ogando, who, hopefully for Alexi Ogando of the Rangers, is not his wife. Although if it is, perhaps this gives the Blue Jays players a reason not to be too upset he won’t be joining them in Toronto.

“I like my wife,” said Casey Janssen.

Dear NotGraphs,

Cheers,
7th Place

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Actual initial thought upon seeing the headline below:
“Wow, I wonder what Ryan Zimmerman’s wife did.”

Sad commentary on how much attention I pay to non-baseball news. I also hear Brandon Allen won a primary in Virginia?

Is there a more disappointing word than “setback” to see in a sentence about your favorite player, or an article about your favorite team? You think someone is on the road back, ready to rejoin the lineup… and then… “…setback…” and the clock starts all over again. Inspired by news of Brett Gardner’s second (third? fourth? fifth?) setback from his elbow injury (the same Brett Gardner I stashed on my fantasy team’s DL when someone dropped him, hoping he’d be back shortly and with effectiveness), I thought I’d head over to Google News and see if I could come up with a truly frustrating, disappointing post to help you make it through your Tuesday.

This Week… In Setbacks.

1. The aforementioned Brett Gardner, with his second setback, from his injury suffered April 18. Now not expected back before the All-Star Break.

2. White Sox third baseman Brent Morel, on a back injury rehab assignment, pulled himself out of Thursday’s AAA game.

3. Scott Linebrink, whom the Cardinals released after his second setback in his recovery from right shoulder inflammation. Sort of a heartless quote in the article: “…left the Cardinals feeling that their best move would be to cut ties with Linebrink, rather than moving him to the 60-day DL and continuing to aid him in the rehab process.” Yikes.

And… that’s all I could find, at least with my quick search of baseball injury setback. Which surprised me. I feel like there are ten setbacks a day!

UPDATE: LATE BREAKING SETBACK NEWS… Dustin McGowan and Sergio Santos… someone out there heard me writing this post and decided to, uh, inflame a couple more shoulders….

Humberto is my friend and he was pointing out one of my best attributes, my eyes! #proudtobeofasiandescent

— Bruce Chen (@ChenMusic) June 10, 2012

Courtesy of CBS Sports’ Eye on Baseball, this heartwarming article about Humberto Quintero and Bruce Chen.

It’s good to know that CBS has an entire blog devoted to things like this.

Wait, what? Are you telling me that every post on “Eye on Baseball” isn’t about the shape of baseball players’ eyes??? But… how… huh…??? Could there even be a more perfect name for the blog that would report this story? It’s really just a coincidence? Seriously?

Stay tuned for my soon-to-be-launched Ears On Baseball blog, which will only contain posts about this guy.