The best things in life are free. Except this grill, that is. It cost Manny Ramirez $4000.
If you’ve never read the collected works of Great American™ Ralph Waldo Emerson — and, in particular, his essays “Self-Reliance” and “The Divinity School Address” — you should probably do that before you shuffle off this mortal coil.
However, if you’re busy for the minute, you can find much of Emerson’s thought condensed into this very brief quote from Manny Ramirez:
I’m just here to play the game and enjoy it… [I enjoy] my life. All the things that I do I enjoy. I’m not here to talk to [the media]. I’m here to play the game. That’s me, you know. The same. Everywhere I go is the same.
On the one hand, it might be important to note that this was Ramirez’s response when asked, in 2008, about his decision to sell a grill on eBay — itself a curious thing for a generational talent to be doing.
On the other hand, it’s also noteworthy that the above would be a perfectly reasonable answer to the question, “Manny: what, per chance, is your entire life philosophy?”
This is the only picture of Josh Beckett on the entire internet. Cistulli’s honor.
Once upon a time, NotGraphs engaged only in the most serious of reportage and most whimsical of inspired flights.
Then Dayn Perry joined our ranks, and — well — I think I’m understating the case when I say that he left a wake of destruction in his, uh, wake.
As that old saying goes, though, “When life hands you lemons, use the zest of those lemons to make a great Moroccan Charbroiled Lamb & Fennel Stew with 7 Seed Couscous.” (Seriously.) Which is why I feel only modest chagrin when I announce to the bespectacled readership that, apparently, Boston Righty and Inveterate Texaner Josh Beckett has married, very literally, a rocket scientist.
I say “literally,” but I’ll admit that she’s officially described as an “aeronautics engineer,” and I don’t understand the difference, and the Boston Herald’s socialite pages describe her (i.e. Holly Fisher) as a “rocket scientist,” and those are definitely right.
Seeing as it’s only been, like, 33 hours since we at NotGraphs linked to the OC Register, it’s probably time to do that again, posthaste.
While, last time, we celebrated Sam Miller’s proclivity for the word cloud-related arts, today we look at writer Bill Plunkett’s capacities as a journalistic hype man.
As the reader has likely already guessed, the remainder of the article isn’t about baseball at all, but rather just the lyrics to 1991’s smash-hit single “Good Vibrations.”
I neither endorse nor, uh, do the thing that’s the opposite of endorse ESPN prospect maven Keith Law’s occasionally surly interactions with the public. In the words of every pro athlete, “It is what it is.” Plus, Mr. Law’s very clearly a smart guy — both in the baseball, and also in the other kind of, way. He clearly knows what he’s doing, is what I mean to say.
What I will say is this: if you’d prefer not to be the object of the Klaw’s rage, then do consider not sharing with him unsubstantiated opinions or simple ad hominem attacks.
This advice comes a week late for at least five Twitter users, who took umbrage at Law’s suggestion that, tasked with starting a franchise immediately, he’d choose Troy Tulowitzki over Albert Pujols.
Below are Law’s various retorts, complete with RTs for the reader’s convenience.
This shadowy visage may or may not have the good face.
While it goes without saying that FanGraphs’ own Marc Hulet and Bryan Smith are very clearly perfect 80s when it comes to the field of prospect mavenry, this is not to say the bespectacled reader must, or even ought to, limit himself to that pair’s excellent work when it comes to preseason prospect lists.
This year’s edition will be revealed on MLB Network at 9 p.m. ET on Tuesday during a special Top 50 Countdown program. The show, hosted by Greg Amsinger, will feature analysis from MLB.com senior writer Jonathan Mayo and former Indians general manager John Hart. The show will be streamed live on MLB.com. And you can chat with Mayo about the list on Wednesday at 2 p.m. ET on MLB.com.
If there’s one thing that’s maybe sometimes frustrating about the season’s prospects lists, it’s that there’s rarely video accompanying the analysis in question. I mean, sure, I’m not a “trained scout” and I don’t necessarily “know what I’m looking for,” but I at least like to pretend.
Although I don’t know it for a fact, I’m guessing that MLB.com’s presentation does feature video. So after tonight, we can all know just enough to be annoying.
It’s without a trace of chagrin that I reproduce in these pages — despite it having already been produced in everybody else’s pages — Sam Miller’s word cloud experiment from his Angels Blog at the OC Register.
If you’re not familiar with it already, Miller put together word clouds from comment threads at SB Nation blogs Halos Heaven and Bluebird Banter.
A recently re-broadcast episode of This American Life begins with host Ira Glass in conversation with author Neil Chesanow. Chesanow is respsonsible for Please Read This for Me, a self-help book that, as the show’s website explains, “doesn’t just give you general advice. It gives you actual scripts to use in various difficult situations: Pre-written speeches to deliver if you’ve fallen out of love with your boyfriend, say, or if you’ve decided you want to have a baby.”
Age ain’t nothin’ but a number… on Rudy Seanez’s Dodger uniform.
Last week, I played the part of Bill James’ scrivener, rendering into electronic print five haphazardly chosen, but still entirely notable, profiles from the 1993 edition of his Player Ratings Book.
In what follows, I do the same thing for the 1994 edition.
Regard, American literature:
Player:Steve Balboni, Texas Notable Thing: Things plural, actually. The first is — if I’m reading this correctly — is that Jackie Moore’s real father is Steve Balboni. So that’s one thing. The second is this comment from James: “[I]sn’t an awful first baseman, but strikes out like a Deer and runs like a file cabinet.” That he (i.e. James) resisted appending the words “wocka wocka” to that statement represents an exercise in restraint.
If Izzy Alcantara’s parents had had the decency to relocate to Panama before the birth of their son — and not remain in their native Dominican Republic, as they so rudely chose to do — this post might benefit from a narrative complexity generally unseen on the internet.
As it is, it (i.e. the present post) is merely an attempt on the part of the author to participate in the totally planned-out and in no way impromptu On-Field Violence(Or Not as Much) Day here at NotGraphs.
While people punching people always makes for good entertainment, Alcantara’s forethought in the above-embedded melee is particularly noteworthy.
On July 3, 2001, after being brushed back a second time by Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Red Barons pitcher Blas Cedeño, Alcántara turned around, kicking catcher Jeremy Salazar, karate-style, in the mask before charging the mound, throwing an unsuccessful punch at Cedeño before turning around as other players joined the fight until he was tackled by Kevin Orie. The incident cost Alcántara a six-game suspension and his spot on the International League’s All Star squad.
In Izzy’s defense, the Providence Journal offered this explanation: “What happened may have been simmering for some time. By his actions, it appears Alcantara knew something might occur that night. After the game Alcantara insisted Cedeño was throwing at him. Early in May, Alcantara slammed two home runs off Red Barons pitcher Pete Zamora, who later hit Alcantara with a pitch and was suspended and fined by the league. On July 2 Alcantara belted another home run off Zamora and may have, in Zamora’s view, hot-dogged it a little around the bases. In Alcantara’s mind, the July 3 eighth inning eruption was no innocent development and may have been planned as retaliation by Red Barons pitchers.”
Despite the fact that Alcantara was generally known as somewhat of a difficult character, it’s really impossible to feel anything but admiration for the extent of his forethought in this particular instance, it being generally the case that the catcher is the first player to reach a pitcher-ward batter.
If there’s one thing that gets Carson Cistulli excited, it’s probably, like, fried cheese curds or unwatched episodes of Community or, of course, the ladies. But if there are, say, ten things that get Carson Cistulli excited, one of them is certainly the application of quantitative analysis to matters aesthetic.
Dave Dancis has submitted for the public’s consideration what likely represents an important step forward for this niche scientific field in his recent post on performance enhancing beards at Fantasy Baseball 101.
Below are the fruits of what one imagines were probably the entensivest of labors. However, in the spirit of serious peer review, I’ll also suggest that Dancis’s research might suffer from some sample-size issues.
